Pirates of the Baltic

You probably aren't going to believe this. I hardly believe it myself, to be completely honest. But there I was in Latvia, minding my own business and enjoying the cold salty air. I suppose I should have seen it coming, with the salty air and all. To make matters worse, it was only two days before International Talk Like A Pirate day. But I was expecting people to - well - TALK like a Pirate, not to actually be one. So you can (almost) imagine my surprise when I was doing a bit of exploring near the harbor, and out jump a pair of Pirates. Before you could say Shiver me timbers, the air was filled with "aarrrrrrrr's" and "iiiiiiiii's" with a few "Avasts" and "maties" thrown in for good measure. My claws are pretty long and sharp, but not nearly as long or sharp as a Pirate's sword, so I knew it was time to set my pride aside, and throw myself on their mercy. I knew it was time to do that, but I decided to start telling them about my many adventures instead. Before long I had them captivated. I was almost ready to make my escape, when suddenly, without warning, they jumped up and ...


... kissed me. YUCK! Next time I'll take my chances with the swords.

I think I may have to protest - something, anything. But more about that later.

Yours,
BB...